Tiger Mother and Baby Cubs

One mother has beame an Internet sensation with her recent memoir -- Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother. The author Amy Chua is a Yale law professor and a self-proclaimed "tiger mother."

What exactly is a "tiger mother?" Wall Street Journal's excerpt from the book gave us an idea of what Ms. Chua's guidelines are:

1. Never let your child attend a sleepover. 
2. Never let your child watch TV or play computer games.
3. Receiving any grade less than an A is not okay.
4. Your child has to be the No. 1 student in every subject except gym and drama.
5. Your child must play the piano or violin.
6. Call your child "garbage" as a motivation tool. 

Amy Chua points out three key differences between Chinese and Western parenting style: 1) Western parents focus too much on a child's self-esteem, 2) Chinese parents believe their children are indebted to them, and lastly, 3) Chinese parents believe that they always make the best decisions for their children despite what they want. (To dissipate any talk of racism, Ms. Chua uses the term Chinese loosely to include any parenting style that resembles hers.

The WSJ article titled "Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior" has accumulated over 7478 responses and has been featured numerous times on other blogs. Andrea Johnson of Minot Daily News criticized Amy Chua's parenting skills as "child abuse" that will most likely leave emotional scars and years of therapy sessions for her daughters.

David Brooks of the New York Times calls Amy Chua a wimp:

"(Amy) is protecting them from the most intellectually demanding activities because she doesn’t understand what’s cognitively difficult and what isn’t. Practicing a piece of music for four hours requires focused attention, but it is nowhere near as cognitively demanding as a sleepover with 14-year-old girls. Managing status rivalries, negotiating group dynamics, understanding social norms, navigating the distinction between self and group — these and other social tests impose cognitive demands that blow away any intense tutoring session or a class at Yale. "

Adrienne Mong from Behind The Wall questions if there is "love" in the Tiger Mom approach:

"But try growing up in a society like America where people hug even when they just say hello, and you start noticing the fact that your parents never hug or kiss you. Try growing up in a society which places a high value on positive reinforcement and you might start wondering why it is that your parents only ever notice your faults and your inability to be the best student in your entire class."

In a recent face-off between Larry Summer, ex-Harvard president, and Amy Chua, Larry argues that the tiger moms hinder creativity, which is an "even more valuable asset that educators and parents should emphasize." Larry theorizes that tech moguls like Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg probably would not have been born if their mothers were the traditional tiger moms. After all, what kind of strict mothers would let their kids drop out of college?


Despite the vilification of Amy Chua, there are support for Chua's disciplinary methods. as As Alfidi of Alfidi Capital Group points out, "Ms. Chua raised her kids to be winners in lfe (sic). Tiger mothers know that old fashioned concepts like discipline, achievement, focus, standards, delayed gratification, and self-mastery never go out of style."


Even Sophia Chua-Rubenfeld, the elder daughter of Amy Chua, defends her mother in a letter to the New York Post. The one thing that her Tiger Mom has taught her was that to live a meaning life is "about knowing that you’ve pushed yourself, body and mind, to the limits of your own potential."

Now, I'm sure most of you have formed your own opinion by this point. Let me add my two cents. Personally, I believe parents have the biggest influence on a child's life. Due to the lax attitude of American parents, American children is facing poor quality public education systems. Oscar-nominated documentary Waiting for Superman brought lots of media attention to this delicate quandary. We point fingers at the incompetency of the government, the villainous teacher unions, and the poorly trained teachers. However, why does no one question the fundamental parenting skills? I'm not saying you should whip your child and send them to military school. But maybe, just maybe, it's time to stop buying your kids video games and pick up a book instead?!